thoughts racing
worries tumbling
words mumbled ring so untrue
these hours spent waiting
for something
for you.

and watching this game
baby, it just aint the same.
I'm missing your gaze,
and your touch,
and the sound of your name
on my lips,
light touches of fingertips.

and the doubts that were erasing
are now standing up
as I'm facing this evening alone
with thoughts, and wishes, and the phone.

how many minutes have gone by since
last I witnessed your bright smile?
how many words have I spoken
you spoken
promises broken
wishes unfullfilled.
Desires unwilled,
Demons unquenched, but real.

And basketball, and this my season
falters.
I halt in my pursuits
and my mind is altered.
Your touch is longed for, --
your words and your thoughts, too.

have I been getting charged 84 dollars a month by New York Sports Club? for the past FOUR years?!?! without my knowledge? is that possible? Goddamn it, how much money have I lost over the years...

Madness. Senses reeling. Head spinning.
React. React. React.
Who is this boy?
Who is this girl?
What is this world?
Confusions. Illusions. Contusions. Burns fusions.

got back from my California vacation...